An Educator at Heart
As I wander into this midlife with a new vision for myself and a new perspective, I’ve been reflecting on many questions that have presented themselves lately. One of them has been whether or not my love for education is my own personal passion or something instilled in me passed down from my mom. I remember as a senior in high school, my mom was in her second year of community college, eager to become a K-12 teacher. She had her reasons; and she was an amazing teacher once she got into the classroom! I once subbed for her kindergarten class, thinking it would be easy peasy. I was in my early 20’s and those kids ran circles around me! It reminded me that I didn’t really like kids, oh and teaching is NOT easy!
In high school I was heavily involved in theater and dance. If I had a dream for myself, it would have been to be an actress on Broadway or a Rockette, I had some stellar high kicks back in the day! This was my secret dream, one that I’m only just sharing now. The messages I received growing up were always… go to college, get a degree, you can’t make a living on dreams. So that’s what I did. I joined the FFE club in school (Future Florida Educators), chose to go to a small college with an emphasis on teaching programs and suddenly your future is laid out for you.
When my siblings and I would play with our Cabbage Patch Dolls (oh yeah, we had a few of those nostalgic babies), I was always the teacher. We had an old chalk board in our barn loft and that’s what I would do, set up a classroom for our dolls and teach. My sister was the nurse and my brother the veterinarian (it took him a while to figure out no one went to the veterinarian, poor kid).
In my freshman year of college, I took an intro to elementary education class that required us to tutor young k-5 students. Guess what? I hated it! I don’t like kids, but as a woman that shit is shoved down your throat from the time you’re given your first doll! Once I realized I didn’t like kids, I quickly changed my major to psychology, I found that far more fascinating! Fast forward to adulthood and I ended up with a PhD in counselor education, working in higher education. Although I did not go the route of faculty and course instructor, I did do a LOT of presentations to the campus communities I worked for. I really loved that part of my job (must be the theater kid in me). I also loved the mentoring I received from my bosses and the mentorship I provided to staff. I love learning, I love going to conferences, trainings, workshops, all of it! I just loved being in higher ed, until the day I didn’t. It was devastating to me when I could no longer feel the passion I had for what I was doing. I’m coming to recognize that the problem was my environment, and not a lack of passion on my part. That actually is a relief to me.
As I enter this next chapter of life, I recognize that my love for learning has not stopped. I am taking additional yoga instructor hours and learning many new things, I also learned a ton from my aromatherapy certification course, and my engagement in a Buddhist foundations class fills my cup.
I plan to continue teaching and educating, it will just look different moving into the future. I will teach yoga, and help people connect with this ancient physical and spiritual practice. I will host workshops, to help women better understand their bodies and minds and how they change with time and age. I’ve come to recognized that I am an educator at heart, whether that came from my mom or came to me on its own, it is who I am.
Have you ever been incredibly passionate about something for a long time, only to have other influences cause you to question your passion and commitment? Did you bounce back or learn to love something new? What were you career dreams when you were younger, did they come true or did you pursue something else? What influenced your decision? Take time to meditate and journal on your responses!
Enjoying our journaling activities? Join me on February 10th at Shift Workspaces in downtown Littleton for a creative journaling workshop! Bring your own journal or purchase one of our inspirational journals and accompanying pen! Registration and information can be found here.
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